No ifs, ands, or BUTTS about it!
However, its most eyebrow-raising article is about the dos and don’ts of anal sex!
“First it was shocking, then it was having a cultural moment, now it’s practically standard in the modern bedroom repertoireor so a quick scan of any media, from porn to HBO, will tell you… If anal turns you on, you are definitely not alone, but its prevalence doesn’t change the fact that it’s the riskiest sexual behavior in terms of HIV and other STDs.”
According to psychoanalyst Paul Joannides, people are not getting behind the behind as much as you’d think!
“There are some couples who enjoy anal sex a lot, maybe 10% to 15% of all straight couples. But if you ask them how often they have anal vs. vaginal intercourse, they’ll say maybe they have anal one time for every five or ten times they have vaginal intercourse. We occasionally, as in once a year, hear from women who say they have anal as often as vaginal, but that’s unusual. As for gay men, maybe 50% of them have anal sex and 50% don’t. I don’t have exact figures for hetero or homosexual couples, but a lot of gay men would far rather give and receive blowjobs than have anal sex.”
The author clarifies a common misconception about the intercourse seen in porn, and the intercourse that’s realistically happening in your bedroom.
“Understand that the way you see anal sex portrayed in porn is about as real as how they drive cars in the The Fast and the Furious. The anus isn’t designed to have a penis thrust up it; nature did not spec it to handle incoming, as she did with the vagina… They show none of this in porn. Nor do they show communication, feedback, or trust. Couples who do not have excellent sexual communication, who don’t freely give and receive feedback about what feels good and what doesn’t, and who don’t have a high level of trust should not be having anal sex.”
If you’re interested in doing the deed, do as much reading and research as you can before you and your partner get busy!
“Both of you should read all you can about it first. Spend a few weeks helping the receiving partner train her anal sphincters to relax. Make sure you and your partner have great sexual communication, trust, and that you both want to do it, as opposed to one trying to pressure the other, or not wanting to do it but doing it because you are afraid your partner will find someone else who will. Do not do it drunk or stoned, and do not use lube that numbs your anus. If it doesn’t feel good when it’s happening, stop.”
And remember… always practice safe sex!
[Image via WENN.]